


the world isn't kind to little things

by star-lord (liesmith)



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Comics)
Genre: M/M, canon character death, spoilers if you haven't read v2, there's nothing for this ship im gonna correct this hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-05
Updated: 2014-08-05
Packaged: 2018-02-11 20:39:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2082402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liesmith/pseuds/star-lord
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>magic is supposed to protect and save, so what's peter supposed to do when it doesn't protect what he wants it too the most?</p>
            </blockquote>





	the world isn't kind to little things

Magic is infinite, impossible, it is unexplainable by any means. Magic is supposed to protect and save and heal.

Peter tells himself that when he stares down at Adam's corpse, gun rattling around in his hands as they shake.

Magic didn't protect the one thing Peter wanted it too.

They've suffered other losses. Gamora. Phyla. Cosmo, for d'ast sake, the god damn dog - but Peter can't get the thought of Adam out of his head. Adam, who saved the universe. Adam, who let himself give in to the Magus. Adam, whose been the Magus for months now, whose waited until just now to reveal it, because that's what the fucking galaxy does to you. It finds what you love, and if it doesn't kill it, it utterly destroys it so nothing is left of it anymore.

Peter slowly sinks to his knees, gun dropping to the ground. The air is so thick and Peter can't tell if it's because he's about to have an anxiety attack or because it's just that _thick_. He reaches down, fingers still trembling as he pushes back the sticky blond of Adam's hair. It's gross, the way the blood has moved like this, but Peter just needs to see him one more time. Maybe he'll look peaceful; Adam always kept a permanent thinking face on, coupled with a scowl some days. 

He's right. Adam looks like he's asleep, minus the gaping bullet wound in his forehead still steadily pouring blood. Peter swallows thick and reaches up to wipe it all off, staining his gloves but he doesn't care. What matters is Adam, right now, right here, dead and peaceful, and it's thanks to Peter.

The guilt is settling heavy in his chest now, tightening it with every breath. This was not how it was supposed to end. Adam was supposed to be alright, he was supposed to fix the massive fault with just magic, there was no need to overlap universes and - his mind runs a mile a minute and it just takes Peter every ounce of strength he has left to breath, let alone make his own mind shut up. He's met himself, thank you very much, and he wouldn't flarking try to calm any part of himself right now.

His fingers card through Adam's sticky hair again before he staggers to his feet, turning to face the remainder of the team: Rocket, Groot, Drax, Jack, Bug. They're looking at him with the same expression he must wear and Peter just quietly taps the top of his passport. The others get the idea and they leave, letting the cardinals destroy the ship. There's nothing left there for them.

Back at Knowhere, Peter stumbles off the transporter platform and shrugs out of Bug's touch, forcing a quick apologetic smile as he vanishes off to somewhere quieter. He stows away in a tight, quiet corner of the living quarters. He just needs a few minutes to himself, a few minutes to collect his thoughts, and his chest gets so tight and Peter sobs, slumping against the wall and sinking down onto his bottom. There was nothing he could do to change this, not without destroying the universe one way or another, the Magus was coming and he couldn't stop it, but it doesn't stop the guilt making his shoulders sag and his body shake as he cries.

It's not very becoming, crying like a child over something inevitable, but Peter doesn't care. Adam's gone. Adam kept him grounded, kept him sane, and he's gone. The galaxy is saved and at the cost of one of the most precious things Peter had left in this place.

The door opens from the other end of the room and Peter tenses up, ready to attack like a caught animal, but instead he relaxes when it's just Rocket, peeking around the corner of the door. Rocket understands loss; even if Groot comes back, Rocket still has those harrowing moments of 'what if this is it?'

"... Hey, Peter... You had no choice. Kang told us."

"I... I know. That's just what the cosmic does, right? I always thought Jack complaining about the cosmos was funny until now. I understand finally."

"Nobody said this was easy. We do hard stuff to protect everyone. Good of many outweigh the few, right?"

"... Right," Peter wipes his face on his sleeve, tries to ignore the heavy copper scent in his gloves, the copper of Adam's blood, and just turns to face Rocket. The raccoon smiles sad up at him, going on his tip toes to pat both of Peter's cheeks gently.

"Come on, we still have a galaxy to save. You can be strong again, Peter. I've never met a more resilient human then you," Rocket tilts Peter's head down, presses their foreheads together and closes his eyes, "Don't forget that we care about you, even if we don't show it. Adam told us about fissures we still have to close. Come on, dust yourself off, and let's go."

Rocket's right. The coordinates are laid out in the systems, ready to go and be fixed. Peter wipes his face again and slowly gets to his feet, nodding at Rocket.

"Yeah, you're right. We'll have a drink tonight, for everyone we lost, and we'll get back to it tomorrow. Can't let Adam's death be in vain, right? He'd have such a d'ast fit about it."

Rocket grins, genuine and warm, and laughs, "A flarking fit! He'd pitch one so big he'd create his own fissure!"

Peter just feels his lips tug at a faint smile and follows after Rocket, pulling his gloves off along the way and tucking them into the waistband of his pants. The last physical thing he has of Adam and Peter isn't quite ready to let go of the heavy scent.

Magic can't save or protect anything, it can't stop the inevitable. Peter knows that now. All he has to show for his hard earned knowledge is a heavy heart and the blood of Adam in his uniform.

**Author's Note:**

> i just finished v2 and i can only cope with the pain with more pain


End file.
